Mindy: Hi, who are you supposed to be?

Santa: Who the f*ck do you think, genius?

Mindy: WOW, aggressive. Wellllll, you SORT of look like Santa, if he looked like a hungover old man who can’t matched his socks. And maybe rolled around the forest a little. What’s in your beard?

Santa: I don’t dress up and wear my work clothes every day, smart ass, and don’t hassle me about my clothes matching, I’m colorblind.

Mindy: Oh, sorry…is that why your work suit is all red?

Santa: Is it? Huh. Not sure I like that…

Mindy: I’m getting a lot of attitude from the jolliest old elf.

Santa: I’m not an elf.

Mindy: Sure you are. From the poem.

Santa: I’m like twice as big as an elf, why would I be an elf?

Mindy: You know…like Gandalf.

Santa: Gandalf was a wizard, weirdo. Did you think he was a big hobbit?

Mindy: No, of course not…he helped the elves, didn’t he? There were