Mindy: Dear god, what ARE you?!?

Holiday Armadillo: Greetings Mindy! I’m the HOLIDAY ARMADILLO!

Mindy: Uhhhhhhh…..

HA: HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!

Mindy: …You’re not a thing.

HA: Rude.

Mindy: There is no holiday armadillo, that’s not a thing!

HA: Yes it is. In the year 2000, on the hit TV sitcom Friends, Ross Gellar introduced me to his son Ben as Santa’s Tex-Mex friend, to help him learn about Hanukkah and the Festival of Lights!

Mindy: So?

HA: By sheer force of Millennial belief in me sparked that day, I became a thing!

Mindy:

HA: Check the Internet, I’m totally a thing.

Mindy: Okay, let’s assume FOR THE MOMENT, you’re a thing. Why are you here now, why are you available this far before Hanukkah?

HA: I’m not JUST about Hanukkah…I’m versatile! I’m the HOLIDAY ARMADILLO!!

Mindy:

HA: Those Millennials are in their late 20s now, I’m losing my demographic. SELF PROMOTION!

Mindy:

HA: Look, you’re benched. I’m the best you’ve got, so let’s make this work!

Mindy: Hey, I haven’t been benched, it’s just…November is hard with Daylight Savings Time, recovering from Hell Week…who said I was benched?!?

HA: No one, no one, it’s fine, you’re fine! <under his breath> jeez, they were right, she is difficult.

Mindy: I’m not benched!

HA: My bad, poor choice of words.

Mindy:

HA:

Mindy: So, what are we doing?

HA: SOCKS! SOCKS-SOCK-SOCK–

Mindy: Do Holiday Armadillos wear socks?

HA: Not on our feet.

Mindy: I’m not asking…

HA: Probably best.

#9DaysUntil12DaysOfDecember

#RunRow

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