I think Dru might be our most tenured coach now? Maybe Paige too, but she’s never on social media…

Anyway, I was thinking about how a bunch of us were talking about poaching coaches from other studios, and I got worried because I think we need to give Dru a shout out, so he doesn’t feel overlooked or neglected… I will say, DruCrew is more stoic about things than BooCrew. BooCrew peeps are super outgoing, affectionate, hugs, lots of heart emojis… you know a DruCrew peep likes you if they nod almost imperceptibly in greeting. Or blink at you. Fist bumps mean, we’d take a bullet for you. Wearing black is solidarity. We’re sort of like the damaged shelter kitties of the Shoreline community.

So when I say this, understand its full import: I take class from him 2x per week and if Dru left I’d LOSE. MY. SH*T. Feral shelter kitty explosion. Psychotic episode … like, taser him and chain him in the basement next to my “boyfriend” kind of episode. And I’d have to mentally condition him to teach class and then come back to my basement. Just, no.

After Dru reads this, all I might ever see again of Dru is a Dru-shaped hole in the back wall of the studio. But really, it’s your fault for leaving, I’d never need to resort to such drastic action if you’d just cooperate! So really, this is on you, Dru. I’m super mad at you right now, I can’t believe you’re doing this!! Okay, wait…right, you’re not leaving (yet), that was all in my head. Phew! Haha, that was funny, right? Hahahahahahahahaha– glad we can all laugh about it!

Also, I will say that if you ARE planning to leave, people should NOT tell me in person and “surprise” me with this news, because I WILL explode and cause a nuclear fall out. I prefer an uncomfortable email or FB post, so I have time to prepare my professional, human-friendly response (and the basement).

This took a weird turn… okay, yes, this is pretty on-brand for me, I guess. All of this to say, we don’t take you for granted Dru!